A home birth in Queen Creek, AZ

“I have been dragging my feet on typing this out and to be honest I’m not sure why. Perhaps it’s because that makes it final? Maybe it’s because I’ve really been having a hard time with the come down from the indescribable high of birth. Perhaps it’s because I don’t know how to breathe the life into these words that bringing a human into the world brings me. How could I possibly describe the moments that feel like the peak of my life? The moments that are the highest expression of me? When I can hear, smell, see, and taste what’s going on around me but have still somehow left the room. The moments I cross the restraints of time and bring my husband’s son to him, my kids their new sibling. I can feel warm water being poured on my skin but it’s on a body I am no longer inside of. The movements I make are automatic, uncontrolled, and intuitive.

Then in an instant I am back. Thrust into the present and it’s time to welcome a new human to his body - a new vessel, no longer inside mine. We have both been born. No matter how many times I do it, I am a new mother every time. It’s impossible to go where I have gone and return the same.

This will have details that won’t interest you in the slightest but I’m including them so I remember the entire experience as it gets further away and the memories more hazy. These pictures mean the absolute world to me and help fill the void that the high of birth left. I hope they bring you joy!

On Sunday, Oct 24th I woke up at around 3am to use the restroom and could barely get there on my own. The lower half of my body was in extreme pain for no real reason. When I got up for the day, I wasn’t really able to walk which was unusual since I’d been feeling really good for about a week. I spent that Sunday listening to my body and giving it the rest it was asking for. I laid with the toddler, took a nap, and just relaxed. That evening, we were watching TV and I turned to Brian and said, “ope, I think that was a real contraction.” Without missing a beat, he calmly looked at me and said, “it’s 7:56.” My Fitbit had been on the charger for months but I made sure to put it on so I’d have a clock available, I knew baby was coming.

We went to bed and right at 10pm I started having some contractions. They were painless so I went ahead and went to sleep. Around 11pm they were waking me up pretty regularly and at midnight (on the 25th) I went from glancing at my watch when I woke, to using a contraction timer on my phone. At 1am, I woke Brian up telling him they had been 10 mins apart for an hour and texted our midwife Jetta and photographer, Carey. Jetta didn’t respond so I called her shortly thereafter just to give her a heads up but Carey was up and ready to go! She told me to let her know when I wanted her to come and I told her I’d let her know when things picked up.

Brian and I got out of bed and he started prepping the tub. I brushed my teeth, washed my face, and started bouncing on the yoga ball. Things seemed to be slowing a bit so I told Brian to relax. I remember being stressed about whether or not I was in labor and if I should bother people to come or go back to bed or what. We decided to hang out on the couch in our room and watch TV. We watched world news a bit and then I wanted something funny to laugh the baby out. We watched Sarah Silverman stand-up and ate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. At this point my contractions were 7 to 11 mins apart and still mostly without pain. About 4am I told Brian we should both try to rest. He got in our bed and fell asleep while I laid on the couch in our room and tried. My adrenaline was too high and I was having too many bowel movements so I decided to get back up and try to get things going a bit. I bounced, walked, and stretched in the dark quiet of the night.

At 5:40am, Jetta (midwife) called to check on me. I told her my contraction pattern which was still kind of all over the place. They were 4 to 12 mins apart and 35 to 75 seconds long but I could talk through them no problem. She said that I was still in early/pre-labor and to drink some wine and try to relax. I did lay down and was able to sleep a bit. The contractions slowed to about 14 mins apart and I was sound asleep between them. At 6:45am my family got up and started getting ready for their day. I still slept on and off until about 7:15 when all of a sudden my contractions got intense. They went from 14 mins apart to 8 mins apart and 50 seconds long. By 7:45 they were 5 mins apart and that’s the exact moment that Brian, Tyson, Vinny, and Lennox all walked out the door.

I texted my midwife and photographer and told them it was time. Carey headed my way and Jetta called me. She explained that she was on the other side of the valley at a personal appointment and would try to make it. She reached out to her back-up and the rest of the birth team and started a group chat for updates. I told Brian via text that I was having a baby and filling the tub. He asked what to do about all the kids and I told him to go ahead and drop Lennox off at daycare and pick up the older boys. Since school hadn’t started, we hoped they could just hop on their bikes and ride back but we had to go sign them out. At 8:15, Brian, Tyson, and Vinny ran in the bedroom door like the calvary LOL they were ready and excited.

I kept laboring on the yoga ball with my contractions about 3 mins apart and 45 seconds long but still super manageable. The back up midwife, Brea, arrived right at 9am and took my vitals. I asked her to check my cervix and then I’d hop in the tub. I remember doing the same when I was in labor with Lennox, verbal confirmation of my body’s progress is super helpful for me. She checked and said I was at 7 cm dilated and 70% effaced but baby was still pretty high – though she could feel his head. I went to the bathroom to pee, the photographer arrived, and I climbed in the birth tub. At this point, things picked up quickly.

The boys were reading “The Pregnant Body Book” next to me while Brian was in front of me the whole time letting me squeeze his hands to release the tension in my body through him. At one point, he had to leave to get the dog from the groomer downstairs (impeccable timing) during quite possibly my most progressive contraction and Vinny helped me through it. I remember being in disbelief that he could handle me squeezing him as hard as I could without even flinching. Brea was telling me to harness my voice and use it to bring power to the baby. Brian was whispering how strong how I was and to listen to my body - do whatever it needed. I was still getting pretty long breaks all the way to the end which made the powerful waves easier to breathe through. I could feel someone putting more warm water in the tub as it ran over my foot.

I was shaking. I was sweating. I was moving. I was roaring. I was completely in my power and about to meet my baby. Brea encouraged me to reach in and feel where he was in my body. I could feel him and next to his head, the bulging bag of water. I moved that out of the way and put my fingers on the top of his head as I was able to bear down and feel him moving closer and closer to me. This was the moment of complete bliss – I was untouchable. Another strong rush brought the breaking of my water and huge movement. I got up on just my knees and remember saying “ouch” softly a couple times and then “FUCK” not so softly. He was moving his head around to get himself in the perfect position, he knew what he was doing.

I leaned back over the side of the tub and felt his head coming out. Brea said “crowing, head.” His head was out! The boys were back behind, watching it all and amazed by the whole experience. Brea told me to go ahead and push his shoulders out when I was ready and I remember being overcome with a sudden rush of sadness. I wasn’t ready. I didn’t want the experience to be over but it was time. Another rush brought our newest family member into the water I’d been laboring in. He was born at 10:25 on 10/25 and we were all bathing in oxytocin.

I pulled him up on my body but couldn’t quite bring him to my chest, his cord was being tugged on. After everyone checking on us both and a few minutes for me to get back into my body, they told me the water was cold and I needed to get out to warm up the baby.

Everyone assisted us to the bed where I birthed out the placenta, Tyson cut the cord, and Brian weighed our baby. He latched and ate like a pro right away but there was still some concern about his rapid rate of respiration and his low temperature. Tyson and Vinny had been downstairs making everyone waffles, pancakes, and bacon so I was delivered a delicious plate of food.

After about an hour and a half, the decision was made to take baby to the hospital to make sure his breathing issue was going to resolve itself though looking back I regret not just waiting it out.

It took me about 45 minutes to get my pulse (of 140) to come down enough that I could walk out to the car and get baby to the hospital. As soon as we got there they took his vitals and they were all normal. After about an hour we were released and the rest of the family came and picked us up. Off we went to go home and be a family of six!

Oh, hey! I’m Carey.

Your future birth photographer, hip squeezer, and we will probs become best buds.

I am that home birth mom with 3 crazy boys, just trying to make it to hockey practice on time.

I serve the entire greater Phoenix area including Peoria, Paradise Valley, Scottsdale, Mesa, Chandler, Gilbert and Queen Creek.

Let’s chat about your birth over some coffee!